


Love is a battlefied

by Seanhaggerty



Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Care taker Clarke, Clexa Endgame, Doctor Abby Griffin, Eventual Smut, F/F, F/M, Firefighter Raven Reyes, Girl Penis Lexa, Heavy Angst, Psychological Torture, RANYA ENDGAME, Sassy Raven, Soldier Anya, Solider lexa, Torture
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-28
Updated: 2017-03-31
Packaged: 2018-09-19 21:56:12
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 17
Words: 17,100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9461864
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Seanhaggerty/pseuds/Seanhaggerty
Summary: Lexa left for the Army when she was 18. When Lexa was 20 she was captured by enemy for six years and was finally rescued. Things turn very dark for Lexa until she met blue eyes and blond hair.





	1. Awkward meetings

**Author's Note:**

> Made a new story I hope you guys like it, I will still write Something strange 2 I promise. Also I just wanted to rant a little on here...I know it is none of my business talking about Alycia love life, but FUCK she needs to move on or something...the pictures I have seen or gross of M (who shall not be named) But anyways I hopefully Donald Trump doesn't screw us women even more and other people who aren't rich, but if so I'M FUCK. Well I hope everyone has a good night or good day.

Clarke arrive to a apartment and look at the white paper on her passenger seat. She picks it up gentle as if it could rip apart any minute.

_Name: Lexa Woods_

_Age: 26_

_Height: 5'8_

_Occupation: Former army_

 

It was odd that this Lexa seem not have any type of family members listed, but someone knows her. That is why Clarke is here...She is a care taker for people who couldn't really take care of themselves...she love the job and it was good money for paying for school, she didn't want to be a care taker instead a Art therapist for wounded soldiers. Clarke finally leaves her car and heads towards the third story of the apartment. Once Clarke reach the final step she groans a little.

 

 

"I seriously need to do more cardio." Clarke mumbles to herself and takes in a deep breath and knocks on room 307 and no response until five minutes later it opens and there stood Lexa...she was beautiful even though half her face was burn and she was missing half of her ear...she step back into her apartment quickly.

 

 

 

"Who are you?" She said bitterly and Clarke smiles still at the woman. Her green eyes made the artist in Clarke scream draw her eyes.

 

 

"I am Clarke I am your care taker." Clarke says with a bright smile and the woman grunts and lets Clarke in...the apartment smell like beer, there were newspapers and books everywhere...bottles of vodka and whiskey laid beside the couch and a empty cereal bowl on top of a stack of books. Clarke took in the apartment and turn to look at the woman who sits on the couch staring at the black screen.

 

 

 

"I guess my sister called your work place?" Lexa said with emotionless voice and Clarke kept her eyes trained on Lexa still.

 

 

 

 "Uh yes, Anya...but she didn't say she was your sister...I didn't know you had family." Clarke says looking back at her paper and is met by a low grunt, Blue eyes went to Lexa.

 

 

 "I do, and I don't need a baby sister." Lexa hisses snapping her head to look at Clarke with dark eyes.

 

"I am not a baby sister, I just clean and look after you that is it...you won't even know I am here." Clarke says with a hopeful attitude but her smile fades when those green eyes are on her so tense she looks around the dark apartment one more time before sighing and went over to the kitchen and started to clean. Clarke cleans most of the kitchen in a hour or so, but she couldn't help but feel Lexa eyes baring a hole in the back of her head.

 

"Just don't break my shit." Lexa voice calls out and a sound of a door closes, and Clarke turns around to a empty apartment. Clarke decides to clean the apartment or at least make it less of a Girl with the dragon tattoo movie scene.

 

Clarke stay for an hour in half waiting for Lexa to return but nothing. Clarke leaves Lexa apartment locking it and leaving to her car, and without her knowledge Lexa slowly merge from behind a trash bin downstairs and quickly went up the steps as Clarke opens her car door and getting in and when she look up she saw Lexa standing at the railing looking down at her. Clarke sighs knowing Lexa was waiting for her to leave.

 

 

_"Send her to the room!" A man shouts in English and two men grab Lexa pulling her to a room. She was strap to a chain, the chain lean back a little and soon a strap to her forehead. She looks around and the man speaks to another man in his native tongue and within seconds Lexa is being shock and Lexa closes her fist tightly trying not to scream and soon the shock was over. "Tell us were your camp is. American." The man yells again but Lexa didn't say another word._

 

Lexa was laying on the floor curled up against the door hugging her knees shaking her head and kept looking at the counter wall.

 

 

 

 

Clarke returns to her apartment that is shared by Raven...who is the complete opposite of clean. Clarke groans in annoyance at her sloppy friend that she loves so much. Raven enters the living room holding two beers and a huge smile.

 

 

 

"Welcome home Bitch." Raven says cheerfully which earn a eye roll from Clarke who walks over taking the beer.

 

 

 

"Thanks Rave, did you put out any fires or make fires again?" Clarke says playful and Raven mockingly laughs at Clarke sits down on the couch.

 

 

 

 

"I actually put out a fire, which I started so HA!" Raven says like a child...Clarke just laughs and sits down with her long time friend. Raven and Clarke knew each other since middle school well at first they didn't really like each other after the fact they like the same boy...but in high school they became great friends. Also Octavia, but Octavia stays with Lincoln a lot...A lot.

 

 

 

 

"How about you?" Raven says and Clarke didn't know where to start with her day.


	2. Tarnished Hero

Lexa sits in a room with a black couch and a chair in front of her. A woman sitting there holding a pad and a pen. The room smelt like cinnamon. 

 

"Lexa are you still here?" The therapist says one more time, she watch as Lexa seem too lost in thought to even comprehend the words she said. "Lexa are you still here?" The therapist says again and she hope this was the final time. Lexa eyes shifted to the therapist but she didn't move her position instead she flung forward tackling the therapist and placing her hands on the women throat. "Lexa it's me. Dinah." The therapist says through short breathes...Lexa features settle and she leaps back and move towards the couch. 

 

"I'm sorry. I-I thought I was getting better with it." Lexa stammers not even looking at her therapist, Dinah moves her chair to stand again and sits down trying to breathe properly. 

 

"It is fine Lexa. It is very understandable you will have these random outburst Lexa, you were held captive." The therapist says and Lexa turns her head again still holding her right side from view. "I want to see all of you Lexa, can I see your face?" she asks and Lexa shakes her head moving the hoodie more to her face.

"I-I have this caretaker now." Lexa says in a low voice, her eyes move towards the Therapist lingering there for a moment and she smiles at Lexa. 

 

 

"That is good, what is his or her name?" 

 

"I don't want her around. I am perfectly fine, able to take care of myself." Lexa says frustrated and Dinah sighs a little placing the notebook on the desk and slightly rub her neck. 

 

"Lexa you don't even like to take a bath...She is there to help you, and maybe she can help find comfort in yourself." Dinah says and Lexa stands and looks around the room one final time and leaves the room. Dinah drops her head rubbing her fingers against her forehead. 

 

Clarke waited outside Lexa apartment, until seeing Lexa walk up the stairs in the same hoodie and her head down. She pauses at the top of the stairs seeing Clarke there, her body shifted a little to one foot to another. 

 

"Why are you here?" Lexa growls and walks towards her front door opening it wide and looks at her clean apartment she turns her head slightly to watch Clarke stand at the doorway. 

 

 

"Again I'm a care taker, I will always be here each day. So you have to get use to me. I can also make you something to eat?" Clarke says shutting the door, begins walking to the kitchen. Lexa watches Clarke enter the kitchen and took out bread from the cabinet and started making Lexa a sandwich. 

 

"Just put everything back when your done." Lexa grumbles sitting down on the old couch and looks at the blank screen. Clarke glances over at Lexa and when she is done she puts everything back and places the sandwich in front of Lexa and looks around for something to do. 

 

"Do you want to watch some TV?" Clarke asks and Lexa grips the TV remote and extends out her arm for Clarke to take the remote. Clarke found it odd that she wore black gloves inside and it wasn't really cold outside. Clarke turns on the TV and flips through station until stopping at old cartoons, and Clarke looks at Lexa who doesn't touch her food but leans back in her couch taking the food setting it on her lap and eats it slowly...Clarke could see skin extend more as she ate as if her skin was burn and she scream making the skin stretch, she quickly looks away from Lexa and watches the cartoon. 

 

"You could have made yourself a sandwich." Lexa says after a hour long silence and Clarke couldn't help but to laugh and shakes her head. 

 

"I am good. Anya says you have medication you need to take?" Clarke asks softly and watch Lexa stand abruptly and move to the kitchen and takes out two untouched bottles of Zoloft and Oxycodone, Clarke walks over to the unopened pills looking at them. "I know you probably don't want me to say this, but this is really important to take Lexa." Clarke says as she untwist the caps on both of them and placing both one side to side and Lexa takes them quickly and sighs still looking at the ground. 

 

"Yeah I got it. I'm going to take a bath." Lexa says roughly but attempted to sound softer which failed. Clarke follows Lexa who stops at the bathroom door. "Alone." Clarke nods her head and walks away from Lexa and watches as she shuts the door.

Clarke clean up Lexa plate and heard the bath going and went to Lexa bedroom...there were papers everywhere books too clothes cut which look like a uniform and a broken mirror a bottle of half used Vodka and a empty ash tray with week old cigarettes. She saw hanging on the mirror a worn out bandage. This room was something out of a movie really and the only thing that was made up was the bed. She took new clothes for Lexa folding them and placing them in front of the bathroom door and slowly walk back to the living room...the door opens and a woman with blond hair and deep green eyes and high cheekbones looks Clarke up and down. 

 

"It's nice to meet you. I'm Anya, Lexa older sister." Anya says in a voice of confidence, Clarke saw a old bullet wound on Anya right arm and knowing she too is or was in the military as well. Clarke shakes her hand and smiles back. 

 

"Clarke, it's nice to meet you as well. Um Lexa is in the bath. Do you want me to go?" Clarke says a little awkward and Anya exhales softly and looks towards the bathroom and glances at Clarke. 

 

"Yes and here is your check." Anya says handing Clarke a check and her mouth drops it was 75,000 twice then what the normal budget is.

 

"Thank you." Clarke says and Anya waves Clarke off and as Clarke walk to the door. 

 

"I will send you everything tonight." Anya says and Clarke opens the door and looks behind her and watch Anya open the door and for short glimpse Lexa was naked but something about her body seem odd. Clarke didn't want to stare long and left the apartment.


	3. Suffer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is going to be very painful, so if you don't want to read about the torture it is okay. I just don't want people getting upset. This chapter is just a little insight of what Lexa went through, and there will be more.

Lexa sat in a empty room, only wearing her sports bra and briefs...she sat against the wall and a smoke filled the room. Lexa starts to cough and tries to find a way out of the room but can't...she slowly falls to her knees hitting the wall with her hand over and over growing weak with each hit before everything turns black. Lexa sits in a room now she is strap to a chair and her eyes open by will and a screen of images begin to play violent ones over and over again. 

 

"You will become a experiment American." A man says from behind Lexa, Lexa grips the armrest tightly shaking her head when seeing men harm young women. "We chose you Lexa because you are different then any other solider. Once this clip is over you will receive food." The man says and Lexa looks eyes shifted around the room before being zap and she groans in pain. "I told you watch the clip. American." He says coldly and Lexa watches the violent images until the very end.

When the clip ended, Lexa was unstrap and taken to a room with just a table and a child chair...Lexa sits down uncomfortable and a tray of food is place in front of her. She looks straight ahead and eats her food, the solider watches Lexa eat her food and when she is about down the solider kicks her to the side and placing his foot on her chest crushing her attempts to breath. The man looks down at Lexa with a evil smirk. 

 

"Your in for a real treat American." He said in a English accent and pushing off Lexa and when Lexa tried to stand she is kick in the side at least five times. "Did I say get up you bitch! Stay down on the ground." He shouts, and he watches as Lexa sits up slowly and leans against the wall...He kicks her in the knee and a right hand hook in the jaw and unbuckles his belt and starts to whip Lexa in the lower back. "Do you like that! Do you like Pain bitch!" He screams stopping briefly and grabbing Lexa by the hair yanking her up to her feet and drags her to the same room again strapping her again. Lexa doesn't know what to think anymore she tries to come up with a plan to escape but her mind was filled with pain...the man comes back with a razor and starts to shave Lexa beautiful hair...Lexa closes her eyes trying to fight away tears that were building in her eyes. She knew that she would die in this place to live again.


	4. Movement of water

Clarke sat in her room waiting for Anya to send her a email. She plays with the pen and biting the tip as she waited. She was lucky Raven was at work because she would either be putting out fires or attempting Raven not to light something on fire and honestly it is 85% of her...It was past eleven and Clarke wouldn't lie when she was fading her eyes close each second but Clarke couldn't fall asleep not yet. Ding.

 

 

_Hello Clarke is this Anya, I want to say thank you for taking care of my sister until I can fully take care of her. These are some rules._

_1\. Make sure she eats breakfast, lunch and dinner_

_2\. Take her walking at night she likes it_

_3\. Put on documentary about Squids she is obsessed with them._

 

_Goodnight_

The next morning Clarke got two coffee's and two bagels with cream cheese on it, she walks up to Lexa apartment and knocks on the door waiting for Lexa to answer. She turns to her side and in the corner of her eye saw the other door open.

 

"She won't answer. She barely even leaves the apartment." A older woman says coldly as if something happen that was personal and Clarke smiles softly. "She is a weird thing...don't purser her." The older woman spoke so cold about Lexa that for some reason Clarke wanted to yell and defend a woman she barely even knew. The door opens to Lexa apartment but Lexa wasn't near the door. Clarke just goes inside and shuts the door and looks to see Lexa wearing her hoodie except had a thick white wrap around her right side, her green eyes on Clarke tensely.

 

 

"I-I brought you a coffee with cream and two bagels." Clarke says holding the items in her left hand out for Lexa to take, she slowly takes the items placing them on the coffee table and sits down on the couch. "How did you sleep last night?" Lexa bites into her bagel and stares at the blank TV and with careful long fingers she places the bagel down and glances up and down Clarke.

 

"Fine. And yourself?" Lexa says into between chews and Clarke smirks a little but made sure Lexa didn't see it.

 

"Great, so I was thinking we could watch a documentary about Squids?" Clarke suggests and Lexa places with the paper bag and nods her head and points to the remote. Clarke finds the Documentary and stands there watching with Lexa, but watches Lexa hand pat the empty seat next to her and Clarke sits down and watches the show with Lexa.

By three hours Clarke glances over to see Lexa asleep but mouthing something, Clarke watches Lexa gasp and within seconds Lexa body jerks forward and Clarke touches Lexa back which wasn't a good idea instead felt a hand wrap around her throat tightly. Clarke chokes out trying to push Lexa off and when Clarke pushes with enough strength Lexa stumbles back huffing and puffing.

 

"Lexa?" Clarke whispers after a while, Lexa didn't move from her spot and place her hood over her head but never drop her gaze from the floor. Clarke wouldn't lie if she was nervous to touch Lexa again. "Lexa?" She repeats herself and Lexa turns her head to look at Clarke.

 

"I'm sorry...I..I didn't mean to hurt you." Lexa says with a broken voice and Clarke shakes her head and stands and walks over to Lexa, who steps back putting a distance between both of them.

 

"You didn't I have been through much worse. Lexa what is movement of water?" Clarke says and tilts her head a little and is met with a low growl noise that a dog would make.

 

"A torture deceive, were you held in water for ten seconds." Lexa says without hesitation without fear in her voice, she watches Clarke eyes widen with realization but soon regains her composure and inhales and exhales.

 

 

"Ah do nightmares come often?"

 

 

"Clarke if I wanted to be fucking questioned about my traumatic experience I would have gone to my therapist." Lexa hisses clutching her fist and glance at the door. "Get out." Lexa says acidly and Clarke wanted to protest but she didn't instead she left. Clarke in a way wanted to fight for Lexa, why? She then knew she wanted to learn everything about Lexa and how to make her feel better.

Clarke is finishing up some work for school and Raven lays down on Clarke thigh and played with her blond curls. Clarke keeps working instead of looking down, and within a second Raven was on the floor laughing and Clarke is holding her chest.

 

"Why did you grab my nipple?" Clarke protests shielding her boobs from Raven who was slowly getting to her feet still laughing.

 

"The question is why not." Raven says and leans in close to Clarke who playfully pushes Raven face away from her.

 

"Why didn't I move in with Octavia and Lincoln." Clarke sighs and Raven sits down Clarke lap and gentle stroke her blond hair.

 

 

"Because they are sex machines and you will hear this. Oh Lincoln! Oh yes! Fuck me like a god." Raven says imitating Octavia all too well and Clarke starts laughing and shoves Raven off her lap.

 

 

"True. Order a pizza." Clarke says and Raven rushes to her phone to call Pizza. Clarke knew that was three ways to make Raven leave her for a while. Clarke finish her school work by the time the Pizza guy came with a large pizza, and of course Raven puts four pieces as for Clarke only two...okay maybe three and the two women watch the rest of episode 5 of Stranger things which Clarke will never deny she doesn't love plus Eleven was her favorite.

 

"So how is your patient? Is she or he young?" Raven says mid sentence with food in her mouth, while Clarke couldn't help but think of Lexa eating...why is she thinking so much about this woman? It was driving Clarke a little bonkers.

 

 

"Older but not like grandma old, but like three years older." Clarke tries to explain without smiling. Raven hums.

 

 

"Is she sexy?"

 

 

"I am not discussing my patient." Clarke says turning her attention to Raven and winks at her before turning back to the TV.

 

 

Lexa sat on the floor and she slowly took off her gloves relieving on her right hand peel skin that grew back but look like burn scars. She closes her eyes for a moment, and is taken back to the room with chains.

 

 

_Lexa arms were above her head held by chains she was naked...the men chuckle at seeing Lexa penis, possible comparing it to there own....Lexa mouth was stuff with paper and she grunts when one of the men shocks her in the stomach showing a scar forming already they start to laugh. He shocks Lexa penis and Lexa howls in pain and within seconds the room was filled with laughter. When the humiliation was over Lexa crawls to the corner and in the first time she let silent tears stream down her face...she places another strike down on the wall showing ten days already in this horror._

 

 

 

 Lexa starts to cry uncontrollable and started to throw the coffee table over and smash chairs onto the ground over and over again breaking every chair in her house and threw the broken pieces at her wall she punches holes above the couch before falling into the mess in the center of her living room. 

 

 

 

"I don't belong here." Lexa whispers to herself and touches the broken wood with her other glove hand. "I don't belong here." Lexa says again, she moves to the kitchen and held the knife to her stomach, but felt hands on her hands who were steady and firm.

 

 

 

"Shush Lexie, everything is okay." Anya whispers in Lexa ear. "I'm here, I'm always here." Anya whispers to Lexa who drops the knife and sobs.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

^2 days later^

Clarke is walking to Lexa apartment she notices Lexa in her dark hoodie standing at the beginning of the stairs, it was kind of creepy but not in the same way. Clarke stops to watch Lexa hands clutching and unclutching in a pattern, Clarke learn in the short time with Lexa it was something that calm her down. 

 

"Lexa is everything alright." Clarke asks gently and Lexa steps forward stopping just a inch of the movement and look down at her shoes. 

 

"Can we go on a walk?" Lexa says untamed voice and Clarke smiles at the sweet gestured. 

 

"Uh yeah lead the way." Clarke says and Lexa turns and starts walking to the back of the apartments and Clarke follow right behind her. There is even a way Lexa walk even though she was hinge over she walk with this confidence a beautiful way really and Clarke was amazed by...Maybe these four weeks were telling Clarke something. She needed to get laid. They walk through the back of the apartments until stopping at the edge of the forest...Clarke silently gulps a little she didn't know if she were going to get murder out her or she would be part of a human sacrifice. "Is this were you kill me?" Clarke asks with a nervous chuckle.

"No." Lexa says quickly and started to walk into the forest and kept walking, Clarke follows staying a five feet distance just in case something happens and which involves Clarke running and she didn't seem to like the idea of running so she was hoping Lexa wasn't some axe murder or something. "I like to come out here to clear my head when...things get rough." Lexa says breaking Clarke train of thought. 

 

"Do you do it often?" 

 

 

"Almost every night. Why did you get a job being a care taker for Military wound with little family." Lexa says stopping and rubbing the tree in front of her and went back to walking. 

 

 

"I like helping people...but I go to school and so I found an opening for care taker for 25,000." Clarke says as she is walking but doesn't notice a branch and slightly trips but caught herself quickly. 

 

"What do you want to be?" Lexa asks in a curious voice. 

 

"I want to be a Doctor...open a place for art therapy." Clarke says with a smile and when she looks over to see Lexa looking at her. 

 

"Interesting." Lexa whispers out and keeps walking now. 

 

Clarke is about half way in this walk and she is dying...why couldn't they do a who can eat a whole pizza. Okay she would lose that too. By the time they got back to Lexa apartment it was pitch black and stars and the moon were out. Clarke heads to her car but stops and listens to the footsteps on the stairs and she sighs and looks up to see Lexa unlocking her door. 

 

"I will be here tomorrow at 5...we can go see a movie maybe?" Clarke asks but is met with the sound of the apartment door shutting. Clarke sighs in defeat and walks back to her car and gets in and starts to drive back to her apartment...Clarke knew this will be very long, but Clarke wanted Lexa to get out even though she might have bad side and Clarke was thought about it more and more and soon felt determine to make Lexa enjoy life.


	5. Who you are

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lexa saves Clarke

Clarke honestly hated class sometimes, She taps her pen on the table and went to a blank page and started to let her mind drift and when she was done she realize she drew Lexa just her head but with the hoodie on and staring at her...those lifeless eyes that maybe were once filled with life. Clarke wanted to know why and what happen to Lexa and she wasn't stopping any time soon.

 

Lexa took off her hoodie for the first time, she had her back to the door, she was burn on her right side down to her waist...and down her lower left side on her ribs was old scars that look as if she had intense surgery on her ribs. Lexa takes off her clothes and her thighs were badly bruised as if the beaten could never disappear.

 

 

_"Where are you taking me?" Lexa says with a dry voice, two men drag Lexa to the another room. Lexa was very skinny and has been 1 year since she was captured. She is place a room filled with one tub, lifted inside the cold water and was held to stay in the water she move her hands and feet under water to get feeling in them but everything was going numb and Lexa soon started to shout. "Get me out! I am a fucking person!" Lexa screams and the men didn't even flich when Lexa scream, they just stood there._

 

 

_"No you are not person, American. You are our pet. My property."  The man says who was in charge and Lexa tried to control her emotions but tears stream down her face. They have broken Lexa._

 

Lexa sits very still touching her burn side and makes out a sob sound escaping her lips but she didn't cry. She was incapable of crying anymore. She touches her right side of her face and her half missing ear and quickly stood up and went to the bathroom mirror staring at her self. She look to be half-human and half-monster, she smashes her fist in the wall again to her bathroom breathing hard but everything in body seem relax and she stood there for a moment and left the bathroom picking up her clothes and wearing new ones. Lexa leaves the apartment and walk around the apartment she spot Clarke car at a gas station, she spot three men in a truck staring down Clarke and Lexa goes towards the gas station quickly. 

Clarke walk to put the gas pump back but notice two men coming over to her and she quickly looks down, but when she is about to get to her door, a heavy man with a beard and wore an old beat up hat and wore also a flannel and he smirks at Clarke. Which made Clarke feel sick. 

 

"What is a beautiful girl like you out here alone." He says and a man behind Clarke whistle staring at her ass. 

 

"I am not. Just please let me get to my car" Clarke says holding her ground trying to get to her car, but is shut quickly with force when he moves closer to Clarke. 

 

"She said let her get to her car. Asshole." Lexa growls and when the man spins around he is punch in the throat, and smashes his head in the pole and the other man rushes over to Lexa who attempts to attack but is met by a fist to the face by Lexa and before she knew she was in Clarke car driving fast to get rid of the men. Clarke glances over to see Lexa clutching her fist very tightly...Lexa wasn't prepare when she feels a hand on hers she looks down to see Clarke hand on her, but Lexa moves her hand away quickly. "I should have been with you." Lexa says after a while staring out the window. 

 

"You were here before they could do something. Let's go to a movie." Clarke says driving to the movie show. Lexa keeps staring out the window, she thought about the last time she went to a movie show...the last time was with Anya and her ex-girlfriend Costia, that was eight years ago.

when they arrive to the movie theater, Lexa kept her eyes trained on Clarke watching her body language, she stare to long on Clarke body...the way her clothes fit her so well...Lexa felt the twitch in her pants she sighs awkwardly looking around but keeping her head low. 

 

"So do you want to see Hacksaw ridge?" Clarke says glancing over at Lexa, and couldn't help but smile when she hears a low breathless chuckle escape from Lexa lips. 

 

"You want to take a ex-solider to a war movie?" Lexa says with hidden smile and Clarke chuckles and looks back up at the board of movies. 

 

"Right bad choice. Um Two for Ghostbusters." Clarke says and gives the lady her card. They got popcorn and drinks when they got inside Clarke sat next to Lexa and glances over to her to see enjoying herself. Lexa couldn't help but smile when Clarke started to laugh the husky laugh was beautiful, but Lexa looks away and took sips of her drink softly and watch the movie.

When the movie ended both women walk side by side talking about the movie, to be honest it was the most Lexa spoke in the last six years. She started to enjoy Clarke company. When Clarke arrive to Lexa apartment, she started to get out but her wrist is grab firmly by Lexa and Clarke looks over to see Lexa staring straight still. 

 

"I'll be fine Clarke...get some rest." Lexa says softly, Clarke couldn't form words the voice Lexa used was strange like not her own. Clarke smiles softly and patted Lexa hand and she let go. 

 

"My roommate will be fine by herself for another hour or so...also I have restrict orders by your sister to walk with you at night." Clarke says with a teasing smile even though Lexa couldn't see it. Lexa sighs in defeat and slowly gets out of the car and heads upstairs which Clarke follows Lexa to her apartment even though they should be walking...Clarke is taken back at the destroy living room and she gentle touches Lexa shoulder. "I accept you for who you are Lexa." Clarke says in a caring voice which is met by a scowl and Lexa turns around still with her head down and takes off her hoodie...Clarke finally sees half on the right side of Lexa face is burn and half a missing ear...her hair wasn't growing on the right side and Clarke could see the right side jaw was straight able and when Clarke went to touch the bad side she is grab harshly and is met by angry eyes. 

 

"I'm a monster, you shouldn't accept me for who I am...I've done things terrible things, a survivor. So you know now that the monster has face." Lexa says darkly but knelt her eyebrows together in confession when Clarke smiles at her. 

 

 

"Shouldn't life be more then just surviving? I don't see you as monster Lexa. Now let me get your medicine and we can go on that work or watch something on TV." Clarke says still with that smile and Lexa looks away from those blue eyes and she sighs and follows Clarke to the kitchen and takes her medication and sits on the old couch waiting for Clarke. Things were going to change between them and Lexa couldn't help but be filled with regret as for Clarke she couldn't wait for the next step between her and Lexa.


	6. Thousand hands

Today was not a good for Lexa, she feels the pain in body as if it were on fire. She feels a hand on her shoulder, she jerks away and looks to see Clarke staring at her worried. 

 

"Your not real." Lexa says backing away from Clarke, she looks around the room terrified. 

 

"Lexa it is me. It's Clarke." Clarke says and if she was being honest she didn't know what to do...Lexa shakes her head and clutches her fist tightly and watch Clarke walk towards her and everything froze for Lexa...Lexa falls to the floor and starts to shake violently and Clarke rushes towards her holding her. This wasn't a stroke Clarke has seen countless of them and she knew this wasn't one, more as if her body was reacting to something that wasn't even there, and Clarke rubs circles on Lexa back. "Shh, your okay." Clarke whispers in Lexa ear as she keeps shaking until everything went still and Lexa body went limp and she panted hard as she just finishing running three miles none stop.

"Your real." Lexa says in a whispers and held Clarke hand tightly afraid that if she let go everything would disappear and she would be back in that room again strap to a chair with a needle in her arm. Clarke plays with Lexa hair softly with the edge of her fingers as if she were painting a picture and didn't want to ruin it. 

 

 

"Yes it's okay do you want to lay on the couch?" Clarke asks still with a soft voice and is met only with a nod and Clarke lays Lexa on the couch, and shortly goes to the kitchen and makes Lexa a sandwich and gets her two pills setting them down beside each other, she went to grab a water bottle placing it down beside the two pills and a inch away from the plate. Clarke looks to see Lexa hands long fingers but the skin seem scarred and rough like sand paper.

"Thank you." Lexa says after her food was gone and she took her pills, but didn't meant Clarke eyes and just look down at the floor and felt the cushion beside her sink and she saw small pale hands on her knee. Lexa didn't know how to take it, the feeling of Clarke hand was amazing but in a way made Lexa nervous and she didn't like it. She was already nervous as it was but she didn't stop Clarke from touching her. 

 

"I'll always be here Lexa. You can always talk to me." Clarke says in a gentle voice and Lexa scuffles and stands up. 

 

"I'm going to be late for my session...do you mind taking me." Lexa says in a tight voice but never made eye contact with Clarke. She hums grabbing her things and watch Lexa place her hoodie back on her head and gloves and walk outside followed by Clarke.

Clarke sat in the car during Lexa therapy session and listen to some music, and Don't cha came on Clarke turn up the music and started singing and dancing. 

 

"Don't cha wish were your girlfriend was freak like me." Clarke sings badly and off key and still dancing as Clarke was getting more into the music she heard a knock on the passenger window and jump slightly and look over to see Lexa standing there with what look like a smirk...Clarke unlocks the car and she could feel the heat in her cheeks. Lexa sat down in the seat and glances over at Clarke. 

 

"Please continue, don't stop on my watch." Lexa says with a playful tone to it and Clarke beams a little and turns it up again as singing along. Lexa keeps her eyes trained on her window but couldn't help but move her left foot along with the beat.

Anya sat in a coffee shop typing on her computer and soon stop finally and went up to the barista and order herself a coffee. 

 

"Your cold coffee drinker huh?" A voice says from behind Anya and she turns around to see a average height Latina with a firehouse shirt with the logo Ark fire and she had a playfully smile but is met by narrow eyes of Anya. 

 

"Yes, is that a problem?" She says tilting her head a little moving aside for the Latina to order whatever she was getting. 

 

"No I would think you would go for something hot like yourself." Raven smirks and look very proud of herself and is met only by a snort and Anya rolls her eyes and waited for her drink. 

 

"I bet you feel very proud of that?" Anya says with a tiny smirk and step forward in the Latina personal space and look down at her. "If you want to bone me, you got a try a little harder." Anya says with a smirk and turns on her heels and grabbing her ice coffee before the person could say her name and walk back over to her seat and when Anya was out of ear shot Raven looks back at the high school boy with a big smile. 

 

"I'm so going to marry her someday." Raven says as she pays for her drink.

Lexa and Clarke played cards together and which Clarke was getting frustrated as she is losing the game once again and looks up at Lexa whose eyes were trained on the cards. 

 

"I think your cheating." Clarke says with a smirk and Lexa green eyes look up from the cards and she tilts her head a little and hums. 

 

"Your just upset that I'm still beating you at a very simple game of gold fish." Lexa says in a teasing voice which is met by a throaty groan from Clarke who throws her cards down in defeat and lays back, and Lexa places her cards down and stood up from the floor and look around for a moment and walk over to the kitchen and took the sandwich and carefully extends her left arm with the turkey sandwich and Clarke smiles wide a takes it. 

 

"Thank you." She says and Lexa already with the sandwich down her throat just nods and sits back down on the floor. "So what made you join the army?" Clarke says after she swallow her bite, she looks to see Lexa staring at Clarke with intense eyes but she kept eating until it was gone and never drop her gaze from Clarke, which was kind of making Clarke a little nervous to honest. 

 

"My sister Anya was in and wanted to be just like her. I wanted to make her proud." Lexa says but hangs her head as if she failed at making her sister proud and Clarke frowns a bit. 

 

"I think your sister is proud of you no matter what Lexa." Clarke says firmly "I mean maybe you both make each other mad but I couldn't see how she couldn't be so proud of you." Clarke says and is met by soft green eyes and Lexa continues to play with her fingers and Clarke smiles and extends out her hand and Lexa takes Clarke hand nervously and her breath hitches feeling those soft fingers on her hand was something else, something foreign on her skin. "Did it hurt?" Clarke asks softly looking Lexa hands. 

 

"In the beginning but not anymore." Lexa says in a soft voice and watch Clarke move the hoodie sleeve up more and softly moves her fingers along the skin, and Lexa knew her heart was pounding so hard in her chest but she tried to control another part of her which wasn't working. She moves her arm away from Clarke and awkwardly shifts in her spot and Clarke moves a little back from Lexa.

Clarke ran Lexa a bath that evening making it hot as Lexa wanted it, and watch Lexa step forward in only a sports and boxers...Clarke saw every scar on Lexa body but she was beautiful and when Clarke glances down her legs she thought she saw something but quickly look up at Lexa who stood there patiently. 

 

"It's okay Clarke I can get in the tub fine." Lexa says and Clarke just nods her head and leaves the bathroom quickly. Lexa strips down to nothing and steps into the bath and laid back against the tub and played with the water and bubbles with her fingers slowly. Lexa let's out a happy sigh and close her eyes for the first time knowing she might be okay.


	7. I lied

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Time jump a month into it. Also what would guys like to see in the next chapter.

Clarke finishes up some paper work at the hospital and a older woman with the name tag Griffin on walks in and she smiles at Clarke setting down some food in front of Clarke practically moans in happiness. 

 

"Thanks mom." Clarke says as she takes a bite of her food and Abby grins at her daughter. 

 

"No problem honey, so how is your second job going?" Abby says as she sits down and Clarke swallows and uses the napkin over her lips and crumbles it in her left hand.

 

"Um good, you know basic taking care of the person." Clarke says with a shrug and Abby raises her eyebrow skeptical of her daughter words. 

 

"I could always ask Raven or Octavia about the person?" Abby teases and Clarke bites her lip. 

 

"No-no we are so good. The person I take care of is a girl...and she is really nice and I think I like her." Clarke says sighing completely annoyed by relieving the new information and Abby keeps smiling at Clarke.

 

"Wow, I would like to meet this person." Abby says standing up but puts her hand up stopping Clarke from protesting and walks out the tiny office room. Clarke groans and bites into her sandwich and chews softly and looks back the computer.

Later that evening at Lexa house, Clarke arrives and immediately started pacing nervously and sometimes look over at Lexa.

 

Lexa watches Clarke pace her living room quiet fast and Lexa rubs her right temple growing annoyed with Clarke. 

 

"Just tell me what is going on?" Lexa asks frustrated and watch Clarke carefully and finally Clarke stop in her movements and turn to face Lexa fully and starts to bite her thumb nail. 

 

"My mom wants to meet you." Clarke says and Lexa tilts her head a little confused and her eyebrow knelt together to the right side but Lexa didn't have the eyebrow. 

 

"Why?" Lexa says more upset and Clarke could see Lexa was getting upset with the idea and she shakes her head. "No I am not meeting your mom, we're not even dating." Lexa bitterly says and Clarke nods her head. 

 

"I know, but she likes to meet everyone...I can tell her no." Clarke says pulling out her phone and felt two hands on her hands and she look up to see Lexa staring at her. 

 

"It's okay...I will meet your mom." Lexa says softly and she pulls away from Clarke quickly and sits back at her couch.

(The next day)

 

Lexa wraps her bad side as she sat in the car with Clarke. Lexa knew this was probably against policy to meet parents...right? Lexa looks around at the huge house and look back at Clarke with a odd expression. She wondered why she did such a simple job when she probably had tons of money...Lexa follows Clarke to the front door and spot a child drawing of a circle on the white doorway and looks over to see Clarke waiting for Lexa to follow her into the house. When she enter she see the narrow stairwell to the upstairs and a wall with many pictures on it and a single door. She step into the next room to a living room and the kitchen behind it...a woman with brown hair back face away from them cutting up something. Raven enters from the back room and stop in her tracks seeing Lexa. 

 

"Raven this is Lexa." Clarke says with a warm smile, and she glances over to see Lexa not even paying attention to Raven only staring away from Raven. Clarke quickly looks back at Raven, who nods her head and goes over to Abby. When Abby finally turned to see her daughter, she saw Lexa and nearly drop her knife because the way Lexa look...Abby smiles softly placing the knife down and walks over to Lexa, but Lexa steps back still watching Abby hands so closely and Clarke stops her mom from coming closer and turns to face Lexa and could tell this was making Lexa uncomfortable. She didn't know why Lexa agreed to this. 

"Sick wrap." Raven shouts through the awkwardness which made Lexa eyes shift up to look at Raven who smile brightly at Lexa, who in return smile awkwardly. 

 

"Thanks." Lexa says and looks around the living room ignoring now Abby and touch the leather couch with her gloves and slowly move her fingers against it. As Lexa was preoccupied with the couch, Abby pulls her daughter into the kitchen. 

 

"This is the girl? How long has she...?" Abby trails off in a whisper and Clarke sighs a little rubbing her forehead a little. Raven walks over to Lexa. 

 

"She doesn't really bring it up." Clarke says. 

 

 

Raven looks at Lexa more closely and clears her throat and when Lexa turn her head to stare at Raven. Raven stare into those green eyes and they almost reminded her of someone she knew like the woman from the coffee shop, but different cheek bone structure though not as define as the woman but oddly similar. 

 

"So what rank did you serve?" Raven asks with a smirk and Lexa stare down Raven carefully and look down her body slowly and knelt her one eyebrow together. 

 

"Army. You?" 

 

"Air force." Raven says with a smile and Lexa returns the smile. When Clarke turn her head to see her best friend talking to Lexa...someone she cares a lot about was amazing. Then the front door opens and shuts hard, Lexa spins around clutching her fist tightly, waiting to strike any minute. A younger girl with long dark brown hair and brown eyes and had a huge smile plastered on her face giving Raven a hug, a big burly black guy follow right behind her. 

 

"Hey I'm Octavia and this Lincoln." Octavia says with a smile now looking at Lexa who just nods her head and spins back around looking out the window that went to the backyard. Octavia gives a look to Raven, and Raven just shakes her head. Octavia rushes over to Clarke to talk to her. Raven eyes shifted to Lexa to see her fist still tense and a loud pop makes Lexa jump high enough misplacing her footing and slipping on her ass...Clarke immediately goes to help her up but Lexa quickly shoves Clarke hands away from her and rushes outside. Clarke looks over at everyone who stared at Clarke with worried looks, but Clarke just leaves and follows Lexa who was sitting on the grass with hands on the side of her face and rocking back and forth. 

 

"Lexa?" Clarke says softly and Lexa is on her feet and she spins around to stare at Clarke with pure rage, she steps forward about to lift her arm up but stop herself and just stared at the floor. 

 

"I shouldn't have agreed to this trip...I'm not fit for this anymore." Lexa says softly and Clarke goes to Lexa getting closer to her, but Lexa never met Clarke eyes. 

 

"It just gets taking use to again. Everyone in that room understands, nobody will judge you." Clarke says and Lexa scowls a bit and glances up now to meet serious blue eyes and she sighs and places her hands in her hoodie pockets and stare out to the other houses and cars. 

 

"I was tortured for six years...They strip me of everything. I-I nearly killed Anya." Lexa sniffles tears building in her eyes and Clarke knew her face was in pain, she couldn't believe what Lexa had to go to. Clarke places her hand on Lexa bicep. 

 

"They didn't strip everything from you Lexa." Clarke says and is about to finish but looks to see people staring like Lexa was sometime of freak and she starts to walk away. "Your heart Lexa they can't take that from you...come on, my mom makes a good casserole." Clarke smiles and Lexa nods her head and follows Clarke back inside the house.


	8. Take me slowly

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Also I know that in real life it this wouldn't actually happen but still.

Lexa laid in the guest bedroom at Abby house as Clarke slept in the other room. She look over to see the clock was at 1:30 am and she couldn't close her eyes or fall asleep. She sits up slowly and groans in frustration she got out of bed and pace the room and kept her eyes train on the bed, and heard Clarke in the room still awake...she walks to Clarke room and saw Clarke watching something on the TV and was smiling. The bed seem large enough for two people, and look brand new and had flower pattern comforter. She moves on her feet undeceive of what she wanted to do, and she opens the door wide enough for Clarke to see her standing there and Clarke looks over at Lexa and stare at her.

 

Clarke turns her head to see Lexa in sweat pants that hug her muscle legs great, and a long baggy shirt that was her dad. Clarke could see an old faded scar on Lexa chest that somehow Clarke didn't notice before...It appear like the stitches on her ribs as if she was cut up multiple times. But she saw beauty in Lexa.

 

"Hey I thought you were asleep?" Clarke says standing up coming over to Lexa but she pause when Lexa step back away from the door as if she didn't like the decision she made.

 

"I-I couldn't sleep really. Um what are you watching." Lexa says and Clarke goes back to the side she was laying on and was about to change it. "Your off duty Clarke you can watch whatever you want...I'm just um...going to lay back down in bed." Lexa says but felt a warm hand wrap around her left wrist and she looks into those beautiful blue eyes and her breath hitch. Stupid feelings Lexa thought to herself.

 

"Do you want to watch Friends with me? It is a great show." Clarke says with a smile and Lexa nodded her head and follow Clarke into her room shutting the door behind her.

An hour into the show, Clarke glances over to see Lexa prop up against the headboard fast asleep, her head forward and hands on her side. Clarke watch Lexa carefully she touch the scar side of Lexa which felt rough and uneasy like her hands trying to grow back but didn't heal properly or at least no proper medical attention, in a split second Lexa hand wraps around Clarke wrist tightly like a anaconda wrapping it's body around it's prey Clarke eyes went wide with fear but she gasp at the pain as Lexa was crushing her wrist with the grip.

 

"Lexa please let go." Clarke whispers loud enough for Lexa to hear but not loud enough for anybody else who was outside the room. Lexa eyes soften just enough and she let go of Clarke wrist and leaving Clarke room quickly. She sighs when Lexa disappears into the dark hallway and turns off the TV and lays in bed listening carefully to the bed moving but soon stop.

The next morning Clarke exits her room and walk over to were Lexa was sleeping and found the bed made up and literally look like nobody slept it, Clarke quickly rushes down the stairs and when she enter the kitchen there was a ton of food on the kitchen counter and she walks over to it and looks to see a pink sticky note.

 

_I'm sorry._

 

was all the note said Clarke left the kitchen and open the front door to see her car still there but no Lexa...Did Lexa leave? It was a three hour drive to Clarke mom house...Clarke rushes back inside grabbing her keys and left the house and drove to find Lexa and found her thirty minutes later walking Clarke drives passing her and turns her car stopping Lexa from walking. She rolls down her window and looks at Lexa.

 

 

"Lexa get in the car." Clarke says unlocking the car but Lexa didn't budge and Clarke sighs and looks around to make sure there was nobody coming and she got out of the car and went over to her. Lexa couldn't help not to stare at Clarke chest but she made sure it wasn't obvious.  "Lexa you didn't hurt me last night." Clarke says and Lexa eyes went onto Clarke tightly and bites her lip a little.

 

 

"I shouldn't be around you...I...I."

 

"Stop, I chose to take on the role of your care taker. I know what I'm getting myself into. Now Lexa get in the car." Clarke says and Lexa walks over to the passenger side and got in without another word and look down at her hands and Clarke got in the drivers seat and drove back to her mom house and who was now awake and Raven who was stuffing her face with food.

"This fuksjs sogod." Raven says with a mouth filled with food and Abby turns her head to glare at Raven. 

 

"No talking with food in your mouth." Abby scowls Raven who pouts and chews her food and swallows. 

 

"So you know how to make food?" Clarke says turning to look at Lexa with a playful smile, but Lexa didn't meet Clarke gaze instead her lips twisted to a smile. 

 

"I have many secrets Miss. Griffin." Lexa says in a low voice and Clarke smiles at Lexa and walks over to the kitchen and fills her plate with food and sat by Lexa who ate slowly and her hand was shaking quite badly. Clarke stops Lexa from eating and does it for her instead, Lexa look heist but slowly took a bite in and rub her hands together. Raven and Abby watch the two interact and Raven was about to say something but Abby pats Raven forearm and shakes her head. 

 

"Lexa I know this is early, but I want to see the other half if that is okay with you?" Abby says and the room went silent even more then it was already was Lexa looks at Clarke who nods her head. 

 

"They won't judge." Clarke says placing a hand on Lexa hand. Lexa nods her head and unwraps her right side face slowly and when the gauze drops. 

 

"Holy shit! That's pretty badass." Raven says shrieking and looks at the burn red flesh and Lexa awkwardly laughs and Abby moves from her seat and touches the skin and hums a little but when she is about to touch it again Lexa grabs both wrist of Abby tightly just like she did to Clarke couple of hours ago. 

 

"It's okay, we're not going to hurt you." Abby says softly and Clarke watches her mom carefully touch more of Lexa head and look down at the gloves and takes off the right glove and sighs softly. "I remember you." Abby says and Lexa head lifts up and her eyes look like a lost child finally finding there parent. Clarke looks at her mom with curiosity and Lexa looks away from Abby. 

 

"I'm sorry I don't remember you...but I apologize if I-I hurt you." Lexa says in a weak voice and Abby chuckles lightly and gives Lexa back her glove and goes back to her seat. 

 

"You were heavily medicated. No you were strap so there wasn't anything you could do beside shout and bite. I'm sorry I couldn't do more." Abby says softly talking about the scarring and Lexa shakes her head and looks down at her plate and Clarke goes back to feeding her.

By that afternoon Clarke and Lexa went home well Clarke drop off Lexa at her house and made sure she got inside, before leaving to go home. When she got home Raven was sitting on the couch drinking a beer and looks over at Clarke.

 

"So Clarke, let's talk about your love life." Raven says with a wicked smile and Clarke groans.


	9. Accidentally love

Lexa play checkers with Anya who was losing and she looks up from the game and looks at her sister.

 

"I'm going to have Clarke stay here for 2 days." Anya says and Lexa looks up at Anya confused.

"Were you going? The army discharge you because of your leg." Lexa says harshly and Anya looks down at her leg and says and Lexa face saddens. "I'm sorry I-I wasn't thinking." Lexa whispers and Anya shakes her head.

 

"It is fine Lexa. I'm seeing Indra, but I will be back soon I promise." She says softly and Lexa nods her head and looks back down at chess and keeps playing. 

 

Anya left Lexa house and shortly drove to Clarke apartment. Anya wouldn't deny it to herself that is invesgated Clarke very throughly founding out a lot of things...but if someone said something to her she would deny every piece of evidence. She knock on the door and waited.

 

"Oh no." Anya groans when she saw the Latina again who had the biggest smug look ever on her face.

 

"Well isn't this a surprise. I guess miracles do exist." Raven says with a smile earning a eye roll from Anya.

 

"I'm not here for you. I'm here for Clarke." 

 

"Oh a three way I like your style." Raven says and smiles but is met by fiery eyes and Raven puts her arms up in surrender. "Alright to soon? I'll go get her for you." Raven says with a smile and shouts Clarke name, and Anya closes her eyes moving her head the other direction a little.

 

"I'm coming!" Clarke shouts and when she turns around the door to see Anya she froze. "Uh...Anya how did you find me?" 

 

"I'm leaving town for seven days. Can you be able to stay at Lexa house for those nights." Anya says in a tight business voice and Raven smacks Clarke ass.

 

"She would love too! So I was wondering want to go grab a coffee when you get back?" Raven says and Anya looks Raven up and down and the way she look back up at Raven was so beautiful and attractive.

 

"Over my dead body." She says turning around leaving both women at the doorstep and Clarke turns her head to look at Raven.

 

"You are not dating my client sister." Clarke says and Raven smirks still watching Anya walk to her car.

 

"Oh I am, she will say yes even if I have to blow up something." 

 

"Oh hell no, last time you did something to impress someone you blew up my couch." Clarke says closing the door and walking back to her room and is quickly followed but Raven who tried to convince Clarke or tell her ideas which ended up being center around fire and fireworks which was very dangerous in the hands of Raven.

Lexa sat very still in her living room and the door opens and Clarke held a bag over her shoulder and pizza in her left hand. Lexa stared at the box curiously and Clarke sat her things down shutting the door.

 

"I brought pizza, I didn't know what you liked so I got cheese and pepperoni." Clarke says with a smile setting it down and Lexa goes over to it and opens it to see a large pizza and takes a slice of the cheese and starts to eat slowly. "I guess you were hungry." Clarke chuckles and Lexa looks up and sets the pizza on her lap.

 

"Thank you for the pizza Clarke." Lexa says picking at the pizza and eats it slowly.

""So what do you want to do?" Clarke asks and Lexa keeps her eyes trained on the Pizza. Lexa inhales sharply and looks towards Clarke.

 

"I'm a boring person I don't do much." She spoke in a rough voice and Clarke hums a little and her face brightens up.

 

"We can go to my place and I can teach you how to paint?" Clarke says with a smile and Lexa grins just enough to make Clarke heart beat faster...man she could be stud Clarke thought to herself and Lexa stands up and puts out her hand for Clarke to grab and pull herself up.

 

"Lets go." Lexa spoke and follow Clarke outside to her car and went to Clarke place. Lexa couldn't help not to stare at Clarke...she was truely amazing.

4 hours later Lexa grew impatient with her painting and aggressive punches it as Clarke walk in.

 

"Wow hey." Clarke says with a smile and Lexa turns her head towards Clarke and looks flush or frustrated behind belief.

 

"This is stupid. I don't know why agreed to this." Lexa huffs out and Clarke couldn't help not to laugh at how cute Lexa like and she softly placed a hand on Lexa shoulder, which grew intense but relax shortly after the feeling of Clarke hand.

 

"It is called patience Lexa...clearly something you don't have." Clarke says with a light chuckle and is met by green eyes who stare at Clarke.

 

"With somethings." Lexa says softly and both women stare at each other which felt like seconds but could for hours they could, Lexa breath hitches and nervously rubs her hands against her thigh. Lexa wouldn't deny if someone ask her if Clarke was the most beautiful woman in the world. The way Clarke look was flawless the way her eyes were so blue it could make oceans cry and the way her body curved was like a untold story and Lexa wanted each part of Clarke. Lexa leans in and kisses Clarke soft lips and they taste like strawberry. Odd since they ate pizza. Clarke wraps her arm around Lexa waist and Clarke pulls back and Lexa body stiffens.

 

"Uh." Clarke whispers when she looks down at Lexa pants. 

 

"Sorry." Lexa whispers and leaves Clarke room quickly. Clarke touches her bottom lip and smiles but only to remember why she pull away...Clarke follows Lexa to the living room.


	10. Memories with sex

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So my computer wifi isn't working so everything will be done on my phone.
> 
> Sorry for the chapter next one will be much longer :)

(2 _years later)_

_Lexa crawls on the floor reaching for the door but her right is set to a blazing pain and she screams out in pain._

 

_"that's right bitch nobody will love you after this!" The man shouts stomping on Lexa back briusing her even more._

 

Clarke watched as Lexa fought with herself and when Clarke touches Lexa shoulder she is smack hard to the floor. Lexa stands over Clarke breathing heavy close to a animal in so many ways.

 

"I can't be loved!" She screams at Clarke and Clarke eyes wielding up with tears not because she was afraid of Lexa, but it was if Lexa was speaking to someone who hurt her in so many ways. Clarke slowly stands up.

 

"nobody is perfect...I know I am not...but you Lexa will be loved because your so beautiful." Clarke says taking Lexa in her hands and watch those green eyes turn to tears. Clarke holds Lexa close rubbing her back and pulls back and looks at Lexa.

 

 

"I hurt you didn't I?" Lexa whispers touching the red cheek gently with her fingers and move them away when Clarke winces.

 

"I can deal with pain, but I want you to tell me why you think you can't be loved?" Clarke spoke in a serious tone and Lexa turns her head to look at the couch.

"People hurt me...I can't tell you everything." She said looking away still from Clarke, and Clarke pulls Lexa face to face her and she kisses her lips slowly but Lexa pulls away. Clarke watched as Lexa was body stiffens and watch as Lexa tried to control herself and Clarke releases in that moment Lexa is turned on but is embarrassed by it...Clarke pulls Lexa by her hips into hers and looks up into those green eyes with love and passion.

"I'll always be here for you." Clarke whispered and placed her forehead onto Lexa who closes her eyes and her breathing slow down easily and Clarke hums softly and she feels that same thing from early and looks down and notices a buldge and Clarke looks up at Lexa who seem to shy away from it but once again Clarke holds Lexa close even without words Clarke was telling Lexa she cared about her and didn't care if she had a penis.

"Clarke I-I want to wait." Lexa breath hitches and and Clarke pulls away from Lexa and touches those plump lips and pecks them gently. "I can wait." They soon laid on Clarke bed wrap together enough that Clarke could hear the steady best of Lexa heart and she couldn't help but smile at it.

 

_Lexa sat in the chair with tubes in her forearm and they pump red liquid into her and she grits her teeth together. Everything around changes around her and she looks around and everything seem normal until Lexa is covered in blood and is looking down at her dead girlfriend...Lexa falls to her knees trying to wake up her but nothing happens...she is a monster she killed her one true love._


	11. Heart to heart

Clarke jolts up to strange sounds and she looks over to see Lexa body violent thrashing in her sleep

"Lexa!" Clarke says shaking Lexa but is meet by a choking feeling of weight and is meet by green eyes staring at her with pure rage but faded away. 

 

"I'm sorry..." She trails off but not getting off of Clarke who gently rubs her arms smoothly attempting to relax Lexa. 

 

"Everything is okay." Clarke spoke calmly she watches as Lexa lays down next to Clarke again. Clarke lays on her side watching Lexa eyes shift from the ceiling to those blue eyes, and lays on her side and shakingly places her arm on Clarke forearm and rubs slowly, it scared Lexa being intimate with someone...again. A sound in the kitchen makes Lexa leap out of bed and she stared at the door fully ready to attack. But before Clarke could say something her door opens and Lexa leaps in full force taking down Raven. 

"Fuck!" Raven shouts hitting her head on the ground hard and is met by a punch to the face making her nose bleed.

 

"Lexa get off her! Raven!" Clarke rushes over to Raven helping her up and checking her nose and not even looking at Lexa.

 

"Your woman got a punch." Raven says with a chuckle.

 

"She isn't my woman." Clarke says seriously and Lexa sits down on the edge of the bed starting to put her shoes on. Lexa was dumb to think Clarke wanted her. Lexa throws on her clothes and starts to leave but is stop by Clarke.

 

"Where are you going?" Clarke says holding Lexa wrist but is pulled away.

 

"Home." Lexa says leaving the front door and Clarke turns to get her keys but stops sighing running her fingers through her hair and Raven watch Clarke.

 

"She may issues Clarke but she isn't Finn." Raven says with paper towel in her nose.

Clarke didn't see Lexa for two whole days, she didn't answer her phone call or didn't answer the door. She heard footsteps and she turned to see a man staring at her and he walks over to Clarke stopping in front of the door.

 

"Lexa has asked to me watch her until Anya gets back." The man says seriously and eyed Clarke. She simple nods her head and leaves the apartment without heisitation. She knew she screwed up big time.

It has been 5 days and honestly Clarke was losing her mind. She couldn't take it and she went to Lexa apartment and knock on the door hard. When Lexa open it Clarke steps forward making Lexa step back. Lexa stares at Clarke baffled really and when Clarke looks down to see Lexa in her underwear and a slight bulge in them and Clarke breath hitched.

 

"Clarke what are you doing here?" Lexa says nervous Clarke steps forward and kisses Lexa with so much passion and pulls Lexa forward and they keep kissing but Lexa pulls back.

 

"I'm sorry for what I said...I want you. All of you." Clarke says and caressing Lexa forearm and Lexa looks down to see herself growing a boner and she moves away from Clarke and tries to find pants but stops when she feels hands on her back.

"It's fine Clarke." Lexa says with her eyes closed loving the feeling of Clarke hand on her back but she turns around meeting those blue eyes and feels Clarke hand on her stomach now.

 

"No I shouldn't I have said that. I like you Lexa." Clarke says and moving her hand to the right side of her face touching the missing ear and watch as Lexa eyes closed. Clarke kisses that side softly and she feels Lexa pull her closer.

The next thing Clarke knew she was laying on her back looking up at those beautiful green eye girl. They stared at each other carefully, Clarke pulls off her shirt and throws it aside. Lexa kisses Clarke beautiful mounds and sucking on each side earning a tiny gasp from Clarke, but Lexa pulls away quickly with her fist tighten and Clarke leans forward pushing Lexa hands open with hers and interlocking them both.

 

"It's okay, make love to me Lexa." Clarke says pulling Lexa onto her body again and kisses those plump lips tenderly and Lexa moved her right hand from holding Clarke hand and moves her fingers down Clarke body and goes under her underwear and rubs Clarke folds slowly picking up enough wetness from Clarke and slowly inserted them in adding only two earning a moan and Clarke moved her hips watching Lexa every move.

 

"Your...so wet." Lexa says as she fingers Clarke nice and slow and watch the beautiful blond moan tilting her head back.

 

"Fuck." Clarke moans and looks to watch Lexa head now disappear in between her legs and slowly lick her and ate her out slow. Clarke hand grabs a little bit of hair from Lexa and she couldn't believe how talented Lexa was with her tongue. Clarke has been with two women in her life time but there tongue couldn't compare to Lexa.

Clarke was so close to coming but Lexa pulls away and kisses Clarke slowly and Clarke feels Lexa tip against her lips and slowly entering her and Clarke arches her back and held onto Lexa back.

 

"Your so beautiful" Lexa whispers as she thrust deeply into Clarke both women moaning and Lexa moves her hips slow with passion. Lexa grunts soon feeling the tightening in her balls and she cums shortly followed by Clarke who hollows in the air breathing hard and pulls Lexa close to her feeling Lexa shake.

 

"It's okay, I'm here." Clarke whispers kissing Lexa temple and rubs her back softly.

When Clarke open her eyes that evening to see Lexa peacefully sleep on the floor but holding Clarke left hand. Clarke smiles looking down at the woman she is and will always be in love with. She moves a strand of hair away from Lexa face but is quickly met by green orbs and Clarke sighs.

 

"Sorry I didn't mean to wake you." Clarke whispers and Lexa sits up slowly still naked and sits on her knees and gentle rubs Clarke thigh and hums.

 

"I don't sleep very well anymore. But I don't want you to leave...is that selfish of me?" Lexa whispers and the vulnerable in her voice was heartbreaking. Clarke smiles lovingly at Lexa and places a hand on Lexa right side.

 

"It's not selfish Lexa. I won't leave you for a very long time." Clarke says leaning in and capturing those swallown lips and pulls back for air and smirks at Lexa. Things were going to change for both of them and hopefully for the better.


	12. Give me everything

"Oh fuck yes!" Clarke moans out as she rides Lexa like no tomorrow, Lexa holds Clarke hips and watches as Clarke boobs bounce up and down fast. Lexa didn't know what to do honestly she was in a trance watching Clarke move against her.

 

"I'm about to come." Lexa moans arching her back and Clarke hands grab Lexa boobs for balance now rubbing slightly the stiff nipples.

 

"Come for me baby!" Clarke moans and both women reach there peak and Clarke callopses on Lexa breathing hard and feels Lexa hand rubbing her back softly.

"I think there is a legal issue with sleeping clients." Lexa teases and Clarke plops her head up on her hand and smiles at Lexa.

"Hmm probably but technically I'm a part time care taker so." Clarke says slowly moving her finger along Lexa define collarbone and she spot the small smirk on Lexa lips.

 

"I must get up. Got to take my medicine." 

 

"I thought you already did?" Clarke whispers lowly and Lexa gulps a little and rubs her hands down grabbing Clarke ass hard.

 

"I love the idea of endless sex with you but I have to take my medicine." Lexa says with a smile but it fades shortly and winces in pain earning Clarke literally leaping off Lexa and scanned the beautiful woman body for any signs of discomfort but found none.

 

"Where does it hurt?" Clarke asks worriedly and Lexa sighs a little sitting up and touched her right side.

 

"My right side, it just feels like it's burning." Lexa grumbles. It was weird for Lexa to explain her pain to other people, well people who deeply cared about her. Well beside Anya. She takes her medicine and looks at herself through the glass of the microwave, she touches her bad side softly fingers shaking unsure if it will burn her fingers but she feels hands wrap around her and she jerks a little.

"I think your beautiful just the way you are Lexa." Clarke says placing her face in Lexa shoulder taking in her scent that smelt like woods and sex, a odd smell but a good one.

 

"I wish the doctors could have done more...something, so I could go out in public and feel less of a monster to hide your children from." Lexa says softly and is turned in Clarke arms and she looks down at the beautiful blue eye woman.

 

"Who gives a fuck what people see, they shouldn't judge someone by skin but there heart. For fuck sake it's 2025!" Clarke says with passion and Lexa moves a strand of blond hair away from Clarke face and hums.

 

"You should be a politician, you would look...very stunning." Lexa smiles and Clarke snorts and laughs and turns around and goes to retrieve her clothes that were scattered on the floor and slowly put them back on, and glances over to see Lexa staring at her.

 

"I'll already spend enough money on my medical license, but it will come in handy if I need to murder someone if they think less of you." She tells Lexa with a soft voice and Lexa tilts her head to the side and nods her head and walks slowly to her bedroom shutting the door. Clarke exhales running her fingers through her messy sex hair and bite her lip. She waited for Lexa to exit her room which was three hours later and Lexa walks out on just sweat pants and a hoodie and looks shock to see Clarke sitting on her sofa watching TV she would think she would go home by now but not she was still her. Lexa sits down next to Clarke and holds her hand as they watch TV

Anya sat at the bar sipping on the vodka slowly and she feels someone walk up beside her and groans and turns back around when she spot the Latina who sits down next to her with a beer.

 

"Come here often?" Raven smirks at her lame pick up line and Anya snorts rolling her eyes and picks her up drink and the bartender nods his head.

 

"Seriously one of the most lamest pick up lines." Anya says eyeing Raven who is still smiling at Anya.

 

"Hey one day your going to like my pick up lines." Raven says with a wink earning another eye from Anya.

 

"How so Raven?" Anya says with a low voice and Raven eyes widen a bit and Anya grabs her new drink and leaves the bar and walks off and Raven sighs watching Anya ass as she did.

 

"I will clam your ass like a pritate clams gold." Raven says raising her finger in the air and quickly follows Anya.


	13. I'll give you a piece of me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it is short next chapter is going to be very angst sorry guys

_Lexa sat next to a beautiful black hair beauty she had deep grey eyes and a pretty smile. Lexa stares at her, maybe too long but she didn't care, and the woman looks at Lexa with a curious face and her brows forward._

 

_"Do I have ice cream on my face?" She said wiping her face with a napkin and Lexa laughs._

 

_"No your fine, your just so beautiful." Lexa whispers and the woman smiles and leans over and giving Lexa a kiss._

 

_"My sappy Army girl." She says with a giggle and Lexa winks at the woman._

 

_"Anything for my Marine girl."_

__

Lexa jerks awake holding the sheets of her bed so tightly and is meet by Blue eyes touching her hand softly and Lexa moves her hand away quickly.

 

"Lexa what happen?" Clarke asks and Lexa looks away from Clarke staring at the blank wall.

 

"Costia...I didn't, I didn't save her. I killed her." Lexa weeps without tears and Clarke wraps her arms around Lexa tightly.

 

"Tell me what happen?" 

 

"I-I loved her, we met in high school and dated through Sophomore until I was 20." Lexa says looking at her hands that were once smooth skin but now rough and scared.

"you didn't kill her, I promise." Clarke says and kisses Lexa bad ear and she shudders a little looking over and Clarke who lays back on the pillow and who was watching her still and traces her lower left side softly. 

 

The next morning Clarke wakes up to a cold side and sits up quickly and went out of the room looking for Lexa and she turn to see Lexa staring out her window which she never did and sighs. Clarke walks over but pauses and smiles at Lexa.

 

"Lets go out tonight." Clarke says making Lexa turn around quickly staring blankly at Clarke and shakes her head.

 

"No...I haven't, how can I hide this?" Lexa says pointing at her right side and Clarke tilts her head a little and smirks.

 

"There is a small cafe it is rarely busy not many people go...your beautiful the way you are no matter what other people see." Clarke says gently walking over to Lexa and giving her a kiss on the lips before starting breakfast

That evening Lexa nervously played with the hems of her shirt staring at the front door...she wasn't wearing her hoodie instead a long black and white stripe shirt and jeans as well for her gloves...she looked beautiful. She couldn't believe she was doing this in a year...Even Anya couldn't get Lexa out of the house without wearing a hoodie anymore, and she never left her to see her mom nothing and didn't want visitors as well.

 

"You look amazing." Clarke says walking over to Lexa who didn't look up from the floor and Clarke grabs Lexa hand pulling it to her heart, and Lexa looks up at Clarke confused.

 

"Why I am doing this? It isn't important, we can stay in here." Lexa says pulling her hand away and look around the house.

 

"Yes it is, you can do things no matter what people think you just have to try." Clarke spoke honest and tilting her head to look over at Lexa who seem lost in thought now. She looks back down at the floor.

 

"I'm ugly Clarke, you could have anybody on this fucking Earth and you choice me! Why?" Lexa snaps angrily but still not meeting Clarke gaze. Clarke sighs and opens the door wide and looks outside for a moment.

 

"I fell for your personality...but your right this was stupid. Anya will be here any minute see you on Monday." Clarke says walking out making Lexa head snap up and she grabs Clarke wrist but making sure her head was turn just enough.

 

"Please don't leave me, I-I don't want to be alone anymore." Lexa says holding Clarke hand tightly and Clarke sighs and pulls Lexa into her and pulling her face to look at her fully and gives her a kiss on the lips and touches the rough side of Lexa face down to her neck.

 

"I won't leave you. But you have to trust me." Clarke spoke in a soft voice and Lexa nods weakly. Both women heading towards the car.


	14. Don't look

Lexa sat and rub her hands against her thighs and glances over at Clarke who had a bright smile look back at her. She gives Lexa a slight nod before getting out and Lexa follow right behind her, looking down at her feet as she walk inside and she walk over to hostess who face goes white and she stared at Lexa.

 

"Uh how many?" She asks still staring at Lexa still who look away quickly.

 

"Just two please." Clarke says cutting her from view from looking at Lexa and she nods and turns grabbing two menus and leads Clarke and Lexa to a table and many people stared at Lexa.

Lexa sits down in the booth and looks around nervously and looks at the napkin holding her fork, and spoon and knife...she extends her hand out for Clarke who gladly takes it. Lexa glances over to see a couple staring at her then whispering something to each other, Clarke could see this and shot daggers to the couple and when they notice Clarke they quickly stop.

 

"This was a bad idea..." Lexa mumbles looking away and pulling her hand away from Clarke and stared at the little menu with different desserts on it.

"It's okay, everyone here is just jealous of how beautiful you look." Clarke smiles and earns a chuckle from Lexa and she looks back at the menu.

 

 

Anya opens the door to Lexa apartment to emptiness...she looks around quickly for any sigh of Lexa leaving, and found the bed messy...Anya looks around the room to see two pillows next to each other and she looks down to see clothes that weren't Lexa and she picks it up slowly and hums lightly and smiles wide.

 

"Damn Lexa still got game." Anya says with a light chuckle and leaves the apartment heading home.

Lexa sat in the booth and heard laughter, she heard a voice say a name and the group started to laugh again. Lexa hears the words freak and she cringes and Clarke notices Lexa behavior changing quickly.

 

"Hey what happen to your head!" Shouts a girl from behind Lexa and the group erupts into laughter. Lexa eyes begin to water and Clarke sits up quickly and heads over there.

 

"Hey bitch! I would choose my words very carefully." Clarke hisses out and the girl looks Clarke up and down and chuckles again.

 

"How in the hell did that thing get someone as hot as you?" She says and the people around her snicker and Clarke tightens her glare at the girl.

 

"She has more personality then you will ever know." Clarke says and the girl sits up and looks over to see Lexa staring at her with a stances to attack and Clarke looks over at Lexa with so much love in her blue eyes and glances back over at the girl. "What cat got your tongue? Next time don't judge someone by there looks but there heart." Clarke says and takes her hand out for Lexa to take and without hesitation Lexa takes it and follows Clarke back to her car.

When Lexa is drop off she walks back upstairs slowly and stops gripping the railing. She falls to ground holding the sound and Clarke runs to her and is saying her name over and over and Lexa cries out in pain. Lexa feels the needles entering her body and she grips the ground hard, she feels something on her back and she moans in agony. Clarke calls Anya telling her everything and immediately listens to what Anya says and helps Lexa walk to the pool.

"You want me to push her in!" Clarke says and watches as Lexa thrashing in pain. "Fuck." Clarke says and helps Lexa up and pushes Lexa into the water and watch Lexa scream in the water thrashing around as if she was being pull down by unseen forces. "What do I do now?" Clarke yells and Anya stays clam and tells Clarke to go in and carry Lexa through the water and Clarke does that and hops in the water and helping Lexa float on the water and she keeps thrashing. But slowly she relaxes and Green eyes open finally to look at Clarke.

 

"I'm sorry." Lexa whispers and Clarke shakes her head and gives Lexa a kiss on the forehead.

 

"This isn't your fault. Will you like to get out?" Clarke asks and Lexa nods her head.

Clarke help Lexa unchanged her wet clothes placing them aside and help place Lexa underwear on and laid her down and Lexa watch Clarke carefully and extended her hand out and which Clarke took and smiles at her. Lexa turns her head more and lays on her side wincing in pain, Clarke watches Lexa carefully moving a strand of hair out of her face.

"What hurts?" Clarke says in a smooth voice and Lexa eyes drifted to their hands. "Everything...but it will go away by tomorrow." Lexa whispers and Clarke nods her head and crawls over Lexa and lays beside her and rubs soft circles on Lexa back which tense up but relax shortly after more movement of Clarke fingers. Both women didn't notice Anya watching them and she smiled to herself and leaves to lay on the couch and pulls out her phone.

 

**Dont worry Mom, Lexa will be okay.**

**Anya sends the message**


	15. I'm friends with the monster inside of me

_three years ago. (Lexa first then Clarke)_

_Lexa runs as fast as she can...her legs were on fire so we're her lungs and she feels two shots fired behind her and she hits the ground hard tumbling down the steep hill. It felt as if Lexa hit the ground so many times it was unreal she looks to see a bullet hole through her side missing the important things and her thigh, and she was lucky they went straight through or she would be in serious trouble._

 

_"Fuck you assholes!" She shouts when she notices the man that shot her and fires her assault rifle at him and he falls down the cliff like she did. Expect he would be died and not her._

 

 

_(Clarke)_

 

_Clarke sat waiting, she exhales annoyed looking out the diner window and plays with the ring on her finger._

 

_"Asshole." She hisses taking off the engagement ring and slamming down on the table and started to leave true diner and gets in her car and drives off without looking back._

Lexa open her eyes and look around to see Clarke on top of her softly snoring, Lexa places a hand on Clarke back and rubs it softly and she feels Clarke stir on top of her and finally meets blue eyes on her.

"Morning babe." Clarke mumbles and lays her head back down on Lexa chest, Lexa smiles at Clarke and gives her hand a kiss and slides over and starts to walk out of the bedroom and pauses when Anya is asleep on the couch. Lexa watches Anya sleep for a moment then turns to go back to her room and lays beside Clarke and kisses her shoulder.

"Anya is here." Lexa whispers and Clarke shoots up from where she was laying and looking for clothes even though they didn't do anything last night. Lexa smiles placing her hands behind her head.

Clarke looks around the corner afraid to look if Anya was truly there and she saw legs, she turns around to face Lexa with worried eyes and Lexa smiles a little and gives Clarke a kiss on the lips and walks to the living room. Moving Anya legs off the couch waking her up.

 

"Lexa? Why did you wake me up it's only 8 clock? Is the blonde gone yet?" Anya says rubbing her head a little and yawns and Lexa looks at her bedroom.

 

"No. She stayed, why did you come to my apartment and not yours?" Lexa asks and Anya rolls her eyes and goes to the kitchen and starts making coffee, slowly but surly Clarke steps out of the room and looks to see Anya staring at her with the most deadly resting bitch face. Lexa rolls her eyes and watch as Clarke quickly move away from the sight of Anya.

 

"I'm going to go home. I'll see you later." Clarke says in a soft voice and leaves the apartment. Lexa turns her head and watch as Anya pours the coffee into something and comes into the living room sitting down with the two mugs and place them down and pour sugar and milk into both Lexa and hers. Anya turns her head and looks at Lexa who watch the blank TV screen.

Clarke gets home and when she opens her door Raven is sitting in a chair fast asleep holding a toy blow tart in her left hand. Clarke turns her head a little baffled by Raven and walks past her thumping her forehead in the process.

 

"What fuck." Raven says standing up quickly and walks over to Clarke and smells her hair and Clarke pulls away. "You don't smell like you had sex? Did you have pool sex?" Raven squeaks excitedly and Clarke rolls her eyes.

 

"No you weirdo, why would we have sex in a public area." Clarke says and watched as Raven open her mouth. "Do not answer that question." Clarke says rising her finger up and turns to make breakfast and Raven through the whole time questions of a variety of things that Clarke didn't know to either be amused or horrified by how much information Raven knew about sex.

 

"So Anya is Lexa older sister?" Raven asks rapidly changing subjects and Clarke rises her eyebrow at Raven.

 

"Yes...if your going to make draw a weird fanfic of you and Anya found someone else." Clarke says shaking her hand and Raven leaps over and grabs onto Clarke like a krola bear, making Clarke stumble a little and held onto the kitchen counter.

 

"No is she hotter when she wakes up?" 

 

"No like you cranky." Clarke grumbles and Raven huffs out air and gets off Clarke and grabs a piece of bacon and goes to the couch and sits down.

 

"This bacon sucks like your sex life." Raven says and takes another bite and Clarke laughs and shakes her head at her friend.

The day went slow for both Clarke and Lexa. Lexa in the therapist room organizing things in front of her that the therapist put out for her. She watch Lexa reflex improved much better but when it landed on the child placing the correct shape on the box was much slower and Lexa sipes the thing making it fly and hit the wall.

 

"It's okay Lexa." Ms. Diana says but Lexa glares at her clutching her fist together.

 

"No it's not...I'm good with moving things with my hands but not that! A 4 year old could do it faster than me!" Lexa shouts angrily and Diana sits down her notes and leans forward in her seat.

 

"You will get through this. Just like Anya when she lost below her right knee. The woods family is the most toughest family I have ever known...I've been doing this for 25 years and I know what I'm talking about." She spoke with realnes in her voice and Lexa looks up at Diana and nods her head and keeps looking down though. "Anything that I should be aware of?" Diana asks with a smirk and Lexa looks up and sighs.

 

"Her name is Clarke." Lexa says leaning back in the couch and Diana smiles softly and watch Lexa.

 

Clarke and Raven walk together in the grocery store getting items for both their house and Lexa house which was in dire need of food. They used separate shopping carts and went through the cereal isle getting cinnamon toast to three different flavors of cereal.

 

"Are you trying to fatten her up or something?" Raven teases and Clarke glares at her and picks up two pregnals and glances down to two more.

 

"Don't judge me. I work out all time, and I save really hot high cheekbone women from men." Raven says nodding her head and Clarke just laughs.

 

"I think something tells me Anya can handle it. N now stopping talking and help." Clarke says and Raven groans and pushes forward. 

 

Clarke drops off Raven first and helps put the grocery inside there apartment and goes to Lexa apartment and takes up all the grocery upstairs and and by the last bag, Clarke face was red and she was out of breath and grip the railing tightly and lets in some air and exhales.

 

"I should so work out more." Clarke says as she goes down the stairs again to pick up Lexa from the therapist and smiles when a song she knows comes on the radio and starts to sing along.


	16. Let me take you

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this chapter was awful. I am truly awful at writing Sex scenes and I'm always open for ideas from you guys. Love you all ❤

Lexa watch Clarke make food for them and she couldn't help but to stare at her body carefully. She watch as Clarke bends down unaware of Lexa eating her with her eyes and feels a pressure against her and gasps a little when Lexa slides her hand down the front of her shorts and rubs outside slowly and could feel Lexa lips on her neck.

"I-I can't be distracted." Clarke says looking down at he food.

 

"I want you now." Lexa whispers biting Clarke ear and tugs it bite and Clarke turns off the stove and turns in Lexa arms and could feel Lexa hard and she grabs Lexa cock through her shorts and smirks when Lexa gasps.

 

"I want to do something else you might like." Clarke whispers shoving Lexa back on the couch and smirks as Lexa watches her with lustful eyes but also filled with loved. Clarke straddles Lexa lap and touches her bottom lip with her thumb and kisses the right side and could feel Lexa tense up and could feel Lexa hands tighten on Clarke hips.

"Clarke." Lexa gasps softly feeling Clarke grind against her and Clarke smiles and slowly takes off her shirt and bra neck. Lexa dips her head forward taking a stiff pink nipple in her mouth and sucks hard and Clarke moans tangling her fingers in Lexa hair. Before Clarke knew she was on her back and stared into black eyes and could feel Lexa shaking.

"I want you baby to lose control. Can you baby?" Clarke says softly and Lexa looks at Clarke worried and pulls down her pants to her thighs along with her boxers and takes Clarke pants and parties off roughly and she lined up her thick cock to Clarke wet pussy and slams into her earning a moan from Clarke and herself. Lexa snaps her hips forward thrusting into Clarke hard and kept going and Clarke moans loudly and grip onto Lexa back. "Yes Lexa! Oh yes!" Clarke moans out and Lexa went faster and didn't seem to be slowing down any time soon. Clarke cums three times and puts her hand on Lexa chest stopping her.

 

"I-" Lexa begins to say something but Clarke kisses her and she sinks down starting to suck Lexa hard pumping her cock too and Lexa moans and grips Clarke ass roughly and cums in Clarke mouth and she kept sucking until everything was gone and Lexa falls back breathing hard and Clarke lays on her chest and smiles up at Lexa." 

 

"Did you like it?" Clarke asks and couldn't help but laugh seeing Lexa eyes closed and mouth still open.

 

"Yes I did." Lexa mumbles out.

They laid each other arms Lexa rubs Clarke back as she rub Lexa bicep and hum softly and sits up and Lexa eyes followed Clarke softly.

 

"Tell me, why did you go to the Army?" Clarke asks softly and Lexa face drops and looks away not meeting Clarke eyes

"I um...I wanted to follow in my sister footsteps and be with my...ex-girlfriend." Lexa says and takes in a sharp breath, it was her first time mentioning Crostia...not even to her therapist.

"Oh she must have been happy to have such a strong woman to protect her." Clarke smiles squeezing Lexa bicep earning a chuckle from Lexa she looks away still with a smile. But Clarke could see something was bothering Lexa, and Clarke touches Lexa jaw which tense up and Lexa looks down at those blue eyes and touches Clarke cheek with her fingers and hums lightly and stands up and Clarke watches Lexa.

 

"No I couldn't save her...she died during a shoot out." Lexa says clutching her fist and Clarke wraps her arms around Lexa and holds her close.

 

"Tell me baby, what happen I want to know." Clarke says kissing Lexa shoulder blade and traces Lexa tone stomach.

"It was dusk out...there was a lot of gunfire...we were heading towards cover when a explosive happen giving me this." Lexa points to her face and Clarke tried to hold back her tears which failed and Lexa wipe them away. "I could see very well but all I could see was Costia gurgling on her own blood I tried to stop the bleeding but it was to late." Lexa whispers and Clarke could tell lexa was slipping to another place and Clarke pulls Lexa face down for her to look at Clarke.

 

"You did everything you could. She would be proud of you." Clarke whispers and looks down sighing and tracing the collarbone on Lexa.

 

"I was engaged once...but the guy was a total asshole and I left New York with Raven and never look back since than." Clarke says rubbing her forehead together and Lexa tilts her head a little and hums.

 

"I'll beat his sorry ass for losing something truely amazing." Lexa smiles softly and Clarke chuckles and moves her hair to the other side and still traces Lexa body.

Raven got onto her motorcycle and headed towards the Ark station and when she arrive she is met by Anya looking badass in her leather black jacket and Raven smirks when she notice they had matching leather jacket but just different colors.

 

"I guess you missed me?" Raven smirks and Anya rolls her eyes and steps forward and is much taller than Raven by three inches.

 

"No but I heard your good with building things." She says and folds her arms and Raven smirks and pulls out from her back pocket a card.

"His name is Wick he can get anything built for you. Just say I sit you." Raven smiles still and Anya takes it and nods her head and goes to her bike and froze when she saw Raven and her had the same motorcycle and she groans.

 

"You got to be kidding me."


	17. Author's Note

Hello everyone,

I have been graciously gifted this story, and will be working the earlier chapters. This is my first venture into the Clexa fandom, and I hope to do you all proud. I will post another note once all of the chapters have been updated, just so you know, before I move forward in the story.

Have an awesome night, and I look forward to speak with everyone soon!


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